Book Review: Personal Coaching For Results - How to Mentor and Inspire Others to Amazing Growth

Applying the principles of Personal Coaching

The book was recommended to me by Joe Ehrmann, co-founder of Building Men and Women for Others, during a discussion about the subconscious and its role to prevail over the conscious. The book is titled Personal Coaching for Results: How to Mentor and Inspire Others to Amazing Growth by Lou Tice. The central theme of the book is how we move toward and become like that which we think about. How our present thoughts determine our future. I encourage all coaches, regardless of their specific sport, to read this book.

I would like to share with you three points that I received from the book and how you can apply it
to coaching.

Point #1: Coaches are Pygmalion’s

The Pygmalion effect is named after the mythical king of Cyprus who carved and fell in love with a statue of a woman, which the goddess Aphrodite brought to life. The Pygmalion Effect describes the powerful influence that one person’s expectations can have on another. Good mentors (coaches) are Pygmalion’s for the following reasons: They think their protégés are special. They help us believe in ourselves. They boost our self-esteem and self-efficacy. They help convince us that we have what it takes to succeed, which affects how hard we try, which tends to produce success, which further boosts our self-esteem and self-efficacy.

I don’t know where I would be today if it were not for those who believed in me. For those who built and reinforced my own belief in myself. Those mentors created an expectation in me to succeed. A good coach is one who believes in people. If they don’t believe in that athlete, they will never lead him.

Point #2: The Power of Self-Esteem: The Wizard of Oz as a Parable

This is a classic story of a journey by Dorothy and Toto and their companions: a scarecrow who thinks he has no brains, a tin man who believes himself to be heartless and a lion who is ashamed because he thinks he is a coward. Along the journey they get to see the Wizard. The Wizard turns out to be a fake but nonetheless gives them more than they ever hoped – high self-esteem. He gives them the following:

• Scarecrow gets a diploma for brains
• Tin man gets a watch to hear his heart
• Lion gets a medal for courage so he’ll believe it
• Dorothy “always had the power to leave” she had to believe in herself.

I believe a good coach shouldn’t tell an athlete what’s wrong until they can tell them what to do about it. How many coaches are negative wizards? How many coaches take away the hearts, courage, and brains and chip away at an athlete’s self-esteem? A coach should build the athletes confidence before they build their competency.

Point #3: I x V = R

This formula: I x V = R stands for I (Imagination) times V (Vividness) equals R (Reality, to the subconscious mind). Any time you imagine something vividly and feel the related emotions, it makes an impression in the neuron system of your brain. Our subconscious minds can’t tell the difference between something that is actually happening and something that we vividly imagine to be happening.
This is an important concept for those trying to overcome the early life negative wizards - whether parents, teachers, coaches, or peers. They are the people that made a negative impact into the subconscious and shut you down through negative feedback. There is good news, however, for those who have been a victim of negative impact. You are the only one who can build a belief inside your mind. If you are aware of how beliefs are built and how self-talk (continuing dialogue we have with ourselves) works, it’s much easier to restore your self-esteem.

I feel this formula (I x V= R) is significant because as an authority figure coaches have the power to build up or tear down with their tongue. A coach is going to fill a gap in a person’s life, a new area of capability. A coach should be long on encouragement.